Spring Break in Ireland

I had an amazing time visiting Oli in Dublin.



Highlights included:

Purim at an Orthodox shul. Jaclyn's not Jewish, and Oli had never celebrated Purim or been to an Orthodox shul before. I'm afraid they were both taken aback by the experience. After the service, though, we found the costume contest and party. They were playing Matisyahu and serving hamantaschen, and we all cheered up considerably. This is Oli's friend Jaclyn, Oli and I posing with the largest bottle of Jameson any of us had ever seen:



Eating at an Indian restaurant with Oli's grandmother (who just happened to be visiting Dublin) and a random "nice young man" she brought along:





Irish music afterward, in a suburb whose name I can't recall:



Wandering around Dublin Castle:





Also, seeing the Book of Kells, Christ Church Cathedral, The George (Dublin's largest gay club) and Alternative Miss Ireland, a drag pageant/competition to raise money for programs that help people living with or affected by HIV/AIDS. It was the best drag show I have ever seen.

The hostess, Panti, opened with some lines about how they are so beyond gender at Alternative Miss Ireland, they are post-gender. Then she asked who the heterosexuals in the audience were? Oh, you poor dears. What a difficult, dreary life. Your parents must be so disappointed. Well, here you can escape your dreadful straight existence for one night. (Yadda yadda, it was funny.) Then -- who is gay? And then -- where are the bisexuals? Oh, are they still outside, deciding whether or not to come in? (Oh, yeah, so post-gender.)

At first we were rooting for Trudi Scrumptious, especially in light of her first number, in which she wore long purple braids with what looked like dead Popples hanging off the ends of them! (Also I was under the mistaken impression that her name was TRULI Scrumptious.) But she was so snooty that she lost Oli's favor. I thought she strung too many songs together, even though the set changes were brilliant; it didn't work with the multi-performer format of the show.

We were also rooting for Funtime Gustavo, the only drag king in the competition. Funtime started out with a swing number involving an entire performance troupe dancing like mad. (This was the Doppel Gang; apparently the Shamcocks have broken up. Tragic.) But he lost our favor with his interview, in which he affected a horrible Puerto Rican accent, among other indiscretions. His last number made up for it though, or at least allowed it to make sense: with an opening from "American Pie" (on the line, "Good old boys drinking whiskey and wine, saying 'this'll be the day that I die,'" he tore that big picture of GW Bush) which segued into "I Like to Be In America" from West Side Story. The number included intense choreography, lifting people up in the air, the whole nine yards.

Mary Poppers was also amazing: "Just a sniff full of poppers helps you take it up the brown, whether you are straight or gay!" with a chorus line of boys doing lewd line dances.

"Muff Diva" was the lesbian performer. She did something I dunno where she dressed up like a flower, and she did a spoof of a Kiss song about how she could show any woman a great time.

Lucy Fur was boring and way too diva. She did "Sweet Transvestite" and some song that was supposed to be funny but I can't remember it anymore.

At one point last year's winner Heidi Konnt came back on, and Oli and I both declared our intentions: we want to marry her. Or something. Heidi Konnt is a genius. She did one number about GW Bush (to the tune of "I want to be part of your world" from the Little Mermaid, with back-up dancers dressed as mermaids, but it was about how Bush should be where the faggots are and Heidi wanted a fist up his ass); one number about the pope to the tune of "Under the Sea" ("Sex with priests is so boring, but sex with the pope! Under Ratzing") and as a finale, she died and went to heaven where she was told to remind everyone about the purpose of the show, to raise money to help people living with HIV/AIDS. Lights up: to reveal Heidi with an ORCHESTRA and a CHORUS singing "The show must go on." A truly spiritual moment.

More pictures of the performers are here.

The audience was asked to vote for the winner by text message. Oli had left his phone at home, but it didn't matter: Funtime Gustavo won! Panti was very confused about what pronouns to use.

Other awesome things included meeting some of Oli's friends (Sef, Helen, Jack), eating amazing food because Oli can cook like whoa, and getting the best massage of my life because apparently Oli is just great at everything.